You can stop sniggering, you've probably realised way before I did that that old bag, Aunt Flo, had decided 15 months of no visits from her was long enough and she was going to crash my party big style.
Being out of the monthly loop for so long I totally forgot what a horrible time I had with those hormonal ups and downs. Two days of horrendous ovulation pain, my body being taken over by a harpy and now the joy of cramps and all the malarky that goes along with it, which of course means taking part in extreme sports and wearing white trousers for no reason at all.
Excuse me while I stuff my face with M & M's and crawl into bed for 3 days.